I’m cruising by the living room yesterday on the short trip back to the bedroom when the Soon-to-Be Mrs. calls from the couch, “While you’re there, could you turn up the air conditioning?” I sketch a little salute without breaking stride, pull up next to the thermostat, hover my finger over the temperature buttons and pause.

Turn up the air conditioning? Now, does that mean she wants it colder, as in, “Turn up the amount of cold air being produced,” or does she want it warmer as in, “Turn up the temperature”? If someone tells you to turn up the heat, that’s obvious. Make it warmer. An increase in heat equals an increase in temperature. But with air conditioning, the inverse is true. If I turn up the air, I’m turning down the temp. Is that what she actually wants?

I’m standing there pondering this when the SBM calls from the other room: “Did you turn up the AC yet? It’s freezing in here.”

Ah, there we go.